Sunday, March 7, 2010

Michael Moore wants Rahm Emanuel’s job


What has got to be the zaniest thing I ever read, Michael Moore writes another open letter to Obama asking to be Rahm Emanuel’s replacement. Moore is completely delusional about what is actually going on in Washington and why Obama is failing.  Here are some excerpts, tell me if you think this has anything to do with reality. 
Now, don't get too giddy with excitement over my offer, because you and I are going to be up at 5 in the morning, seven days a week and I am going to get you pumped up for battle every single day (see photo). Each morning you and I will do 100 jumping jacks and you will repeat after me:
"THE AMERICAN PEOPLE ELECTED ME, NOT THE REPUBLICANS, TO RUN THE COUNTRY! I AM IN CHARGE! I WILL ORDER ALL OBSTRUCTIONISTS OUTTA MY WAY! IF THE AMERICAN PEOPLE DON'T LIKE WHAT I'M DOING THEY CAN THROW MY ASS OUT IN 2012. IN THE MEANTIME, I CALL THE SHOTS ON THEIR BEHALF! NOW, CONGRESS, DROP AND GIVE ME 50!!"
Then we will put on our jogging sweats and run up to Capitol Hill. We will take names, kick butts, and then take some more names. If we have to give a few noogies or half-nelson's, then so be it. In our pockets we will have a piece of paper to show the pansy Dems just how much they won by in 2008 -- and the poll results that show the majority of Americans oppose the Afghanistan and Iraq wars and want the bankers punished. Like drill sergeants, we will get right up in their faces and ask them, "WHAT PART OF THE PUBLIC MANDATE DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND, SOLDIER?!! DROP AND GIVE ME 50!"
I would pay top dollar to see a lard ass like Michael Moore attempt a jumping jack or even jog 5 feet! I would pay even more to see Obama crash and burn attempting to follow that totalitarian attitude Moore suggests.


If you read the rest of the letter, you will find that Moore sees Obama’s set backs as merely a failure of D’s to overcome R’s. In classic liberal/ progressive fashion, Moore fails to blame the actual policies as the culprit.

Oh, one more thing, Moore offers to work for a $1 a year and sleep on a cot in some corner of the White House. That would be fine, but what the food bill?  Just how many Waygu steaks can Michael Moore put away?

8 comments:

Fuzzy Slippers said...

Oh! IF ONLY BO would do this, I love the whole idea from beginning to end. Do it, BO, go prance around with fatty horror show lefties and start cracking that despot whip, you know you want to . . . just do it, please. Just rip up that Constitution, do a little dance on the shreds, and then start dictating policy all over the place, come on, write some laws yourself--maybe on a napkin that Moore hasn't left buckets of grease on--and just sign them straight in without any review or approval or any check at all. Come on! You knooooow you want to. Do it, please, go on. It'd be fun. Especially for us, because we could get your sorry butt dragged out of our WH well before 2012. And that is a wonderful thought. Makes me smile just typing it up. *sigh*

Janelle said...

Curiosity about whether there was a cot which was sizable enough for Mr. Moore led me to camping gear sites. Slumberjack makes the big xl size, capable of holding up to 300 pounds.
Thanks, Clifton, for this post - it is so funny on so many levels.

Obammy is A Shammy said...

sigh..the disillusionment is hard to bear at times...but we must keep up the fight my friend!

Just a conservative girl said...

It would be very entertaining to say the least.

Clifton B said...

Fuzzy Slippers:

"Makes me smile just typing it up. *sigh*"

Made me smile just reading it! Comment of the day!

Clifton B said...

Janelle:

Only 300 lbs.? Moore looks like a 350 pounder if ever I saw one!

Clifton B said...

Obammy:

It is funny reading Moore's idea of why Obama is failing. He actually thinks that Obama has bent over to accommodate Republicans! Was Moore's head stuck in the freezer throughout all of 2009?

Clifton B said...

JACG:

I think the best part would be watching Moore explain away why his ideas lead to an Epic Fail!

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